Friday, September 23, 2005

just soup.


Maybe it is because I am back at school and am poor. Maybe it is that almost-fall weather. Or maybe soup is just awesome and I forgot.
All you need to make soup is some leftovers and some water. And a large pot. A wooden spoon. Well, you get it. Very simple stuff.
Here are some of the incredibly easy soups I have made recently.

As ususal, I am a PRO when it comes to giving measurements. Really though, I just think of myself has a very experimental and happy cook who wants to share my findings. So there. Continued...

Spinach Soup

- a couple of onions carmelized in butter
- a clove or two of garlic
- fresh spinach (or that slightly wilted, leftover salad making stuff)
- chicken broth
- salt and pepper (easy on the salt with the canned chicken broth)

1. Cook for awhile
2. Blend. (A certain Neuman has an awesome blender-stick aparatus that is very appropriate)
3. Garnish with fresh ricotta cheese, maybe some green onion, yummy bread, a little olive oil. Great Stuff.
Plays well with add-ins.

Tomato Lentil Soup

- The Big Three: carrot, celery, onion (all chopped small)
- a can of crushed tomatoes
- salt, pepper, bay leaf, fresh parsley
- a cup or so of lentils, rinsed
- a couple cans chicken broth
- water if/as needed

Heartier than regular tomato soup. This is a great one for just throwing everything in the pot and letting it go for awhile. Lentils don't have to be precooked or anything. As with most tomato dishes, this really wakes up with a little booze. Just a dash of wine is nice. Tastes great with olive oil on top (the good stuff, mind you).

Creamy Broccoli
- The Big Three: chop the onion and celery really smal, but add extra carrots and keep them chunky. Carrots and broccoli are kinda magical to me
- a couple cans vegetable broth
- a couple cups broccoli florets, chopped
- salt and pepper
- water
- half a cup to a cup of half and half

Don't put the half and half in until the vegetables are cooked for a bit, then add the half and half and simmer gently. Let cool very well, it thickens. Garnish with cheddar cheese. (Okay, okay, not one of my healther dishes, but oh so good)

Split Pea Soup
- The Big Three, chopped
- lots of chicken broth
- green split peas, rinsed
- salt, pepper, bay leaf, parsley

Another one for the stick blender. This seems very impressive when it is done. It is nice to have lots of stuff to put on top. Everyone puts ham with it, but it is great with smoked turkey too.


So those are some of them. I am going to experiment with black beans, canned green chiles, and red bell peppers. I need to go to the store and get cumin. MMmmmmmh.

Saturday, September 17, 2005

Dream Bars and Buttons


Aubree had a bake sale at school to raise money for the people recovering from the hurricane. Of course I *helped* her make cookies. We decided that we needed something that looked good, and was easy to make in somewhat large quantities. So I flipped through The Joy of Cooking , probably the greatest cookbook ever. I knew I had eaten a Dream Bar before, but I was surprised by how easy it was to produce such amazing results. Continued...

It starts out with a buttery crust, then toasted coconut, walnuts and/or pecans are piled on, then a brown sugary "like the inside of pecan pie" filling is poured over. After baking, a simple icing is spread over the warm goodies, creating a nice frosty crust. Aubree was quite hesitant at first, she is not a huge fan of nuts or coconut. I assured her that after everything was put together, it would taste like something completely different and amazing. After one bite she was hooked, and knew that all of her friends would be swarming over them. My father said "that is the best thing I ever put in my mouth." So get a copy of The Joy of Cooking and try them. They rock my socks.


Another fun thing I discovered this week was retrobugs.com/buttons. To totally rip off Brownie Points (an excellent blog), these retro buttons are a great "Gifts for Foodies."
Except for the nod to Rachel Ray (at least it wasn't Emeril, that would be unforgiveable), these buttons appear to be made specifically for me, or a little more realistically and a little less pretentious, me and a group of my wonderfully dorky friends. You know who you are.

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

One Fish, Two Fish

I've always had an itching to open up a restaurant. It would be pretty awesome. Really quirky, but elegantly decorated. Mismatched chairs, linens and silverware, but somehow it'll all work together. Wacky retro art on the walls. An espresso bar... Hell, maybe a real bar...

Eh.

At this point in time, I am too much of a chicken to actually go through with it. (Lots of work, I lack confidence, etc. etc.)For now it is a nice fantasy.

Sometimes, when I am bored in class, I come up with menus.

This has always been my favorite dish to include. It is fancy, but still homey. Nutrition wise, it ain't to shabby either. Continued...

It is Tilapia atop Sauteed Spinach with Carmelized Onion and Cauliflower-Potato Whip with a White Wine Sauce. (Sounds important, eh?)

Tilapia is yummy and easy to prepare, and to me is easier to cook than red snapper in that it holds together better. I salt it, then very lightly flour it before pan frying it in browning butter. (Note: This is not one of those Paula Dean "I am making something healthly but throw in a stick of butter." Minimal butter here). Also, do not allow the fish to be over cooked.

The veggie component starts with carmelizing some onion (a touch of butter and a touch of olive oil [If I ever use the term E.V.O.O., feel free to dispose of me anyway you see fit]). After the onion is to where you like it, add fresh chopped spinach and cover. Season with a little salt and pepper.

The starch essentially mashed potato and mashed cauliflower, but instead of milk or cream, I use chicken broth. As one wise man says, "It adds more flavor to the party." I do add, again, a little bit, of butter.

Lastly, I use the pan I cooked the fish in to make, essentially, a buerre blanc. Deglaze with white wine, add a little super cold butter, fresh chopped parsley, salt and pepper.

After it is all plated, some lemon is nice.

This dish is very impressive, yet very easy to do. It would be great for entertaining a small party, perhaps with some tapenade and bread as an appetizer, and maybe a cherry clafouti for dessert. Mmmmh. Who wants to come to my house for dinner? Bring wine.


Saturday, September 10, 2005

My Confession

You cannot repeat this to anyone, especially the fact that it came from me. There are a couple of recipes I have until this moment refused to share with anyone. This is not because the recipes are particularly prized. I am embarassed by them. Why? I think they are cheating. I feel wrong saying I "baked" or "made" the dish. Yet, the food produced by these recipes are often huge successes at parties, so I've always felt like I must make them, both because they are asked for by name and if anyone knew the secret, I would be exposed. I would be a "short-cut cook." I shudder at the thought. Continued...

Why tell you all this? Because I refuse to make the stuff anymore. All this time, the things I have been praised for came from prepackaged mixes and cans. Minimal preparation. Minimal brain function. And I don't really like the food (mostly because I am a foodie snob, but whatevah).

The first recipe is the ultimate in lameness, but people love the darn stuff. Sometimes called "Pink Stuff" of "Blue Stuff" I know it as "White Trash Delight."



One thawed container of Cool Whip
One can of either cherry or blueberry pie filling
On can of crushed pineapple that has been thuroughly drained
Chopped walnuts optional

Fold together in a bowl. Chill. DONE.

Doesn't that just seem wrong! When people at a party ate this faster than my "Slaved Over A Hot Stove Tarte Tatin" I was crushed. It is the most processed, hydrogenated, sugar filled substance ever. And people love it. You can serve it with pound cake, fruit salad, or even use it as a cake filling. Just keep it cold.

Just as worse is my famous Pineapple Upside Down Cake. All you do is melt a stick of butter in a rectangular cake pan, add brown sugar to cover, arrange pineapple slices(save the juice)and cherries. Then prepare BOXED YELLOW CAKE MIX and use butter instead of oil, pineapple juice instead of water, the eggs, and a tablesppon of dark rum. Pour on in the pan, place the monstrosity in the oven as delgated by the box. Cook until done. invert. Whipped cream.

People have actually hired me to make this. Paid me good money to make this. It blows my mind.

Martha, please don't hate me. I realize this is Rachel Ray territory. I promise I'll never do it again.

I am ashamed.

::bows head in shame::

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Pyscho Plums?

The plums in my backyard are looking at me funny. I swear! Ever since I noticed that hint of a chill in the air, the plums on the trees have been positively asking for it. It's like they are taunting me. "We are almost ready, but if you pick us now, we'll taste like crap. Wait to long, and we are giving ourselves up to birds." But now I am on the watch for a basket of beautiful, dark, plums. It's about time too, because I really like making Plum Upside Down Cake. I just love a good fruit dessert, and this one is amazing. Quite a looker too. Continued...

I also really love sweet stuff that tastes good with coffee, and this works very well for me.

As usual, I mooched it from Miss Martha. The only thing I really changed was the addition of ginger, but that is just because I like ginger with plums.

Plum Upside-Down Cake

for the fruit layer:
10 red or purple plums

6 tablespoons (3/4 stick) unsalted butter, plus more for pan

9 tablespoons sugar

1 teaspoon cinnamon

1/2 teaspoon ginger


for the cake:
3/4 cup all-purpose flour, plus pan dusting

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 large pinch of salt

6 tablespoons yellow cornmeal, preferably coarse-ground

6 tablespoons unsalted butter, room temperature, plus more for the pan

1/4 cup almond paste

3/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons sugar

3 large eggs, separated

1/4 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

1/4 teaspoon almond extract

1/2 cup milk

1. Prepare fruit layer: Cut plums into quarters; remove pits. Heat butter in a large sauté pan over medium heat until it sizzles. Add plums; cook 2 to 3 minutes, until well coated and shiny.

2. Add sugar and cinnamon and ginger, and stir to coat plums. Cook, stirring frequently, until plums soften, 10 to 15 minutes.

3. Remove fruit with a slotted spoon, and transfer to a baking sheet to cool slightly. Remove pan from heat, saving syrup.

4. Butter and flour a 9 1/2-by-2-inch round cake pan. Arrange fruit, with cut edges down, in concentric circles starting with outside edge of pan. Fit leftover fruit into any spaces that remain.

5. Return syrup to medium heat, and boil until very thick with large bubbles. Immediately pour over fruit. Let cool.

6. Prepare cake: Heat oven to 350°. Sift together flour, baking powder, and salt. Stir in cornmeal with a fork.

7. Place butter in the bowl of an electric mixer. Crumble in almond paste, and beat with the paddle attachment. Gradually add 3/4 cup sugar, and beat until creamy.

8. Add egg yolks, and beat until well combined. Beat in extracts. Add dry ingredients alternately with milk, beginning and ending with dry ingredients. Set aside.

9. In a clean bowl, whip egg whites until foamy. Gradually sprinkle in 2 tablespoons sugar, and beat until soft peaks form. Add a third of the whites to batter, and mix with a whisk. Gently fold in remaining whites.

10. Spread batter over fruit, and bake until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean, about 1 hour. Let cool in pan.

11. Just before serving, place pan over low heat for 1 minute to ease unmolding. Run a knife around edges to loosen, and invert onto a serving plate.

Try not to eat it all at once.

Friday, September 02, 2005

So Freaking Funny

From another blog called "Republic of Dogs"

Food Network: Who Do I Hate Today? Continued...

(I realize this is long, but I enjoyed it)

Because you didn't ask and never will, here's my rundown on the various personalities featured on the Food Network.

Although I find him scary-looking, Mario Batali seems like one of the few Food Network personalities that might actually be a nice guy in person. Aren’t there doctors that can help with that sweat problem?

Rachel Ray is pure evil. I will grant, however, that she models some really good habits to help novice cooks avoid common pitfalls (Gather your ingredients before you start cooking, time management, stuff like that) She's still an horrible harpy, though, and she will die alone.

Tyler Florence needs to stick it in immediately, because he is a fucking stud. His style of cooking is very near to mine, which is reason #6,428 why he and I should get married. Tomorrow.

As much as I try to hate Alton Brown, I am a total kitchen-science nerd, and some of his episodes have been really informative. I love Shirley Corriher's books for the same reason. Alton's enthusiasm for gimmicky plastic kitchen gadgetry and his horkishly forced "zaniness" make me nauseous. But I still watch.

Bobby Flay is everything I hate about straight guys, all wadded up and compressed into one small and extremely annoying white man. He is such a fuck-tard, and I would pick a fight with him with a quickness. Also, all he does is grill. I am a native of Texas, so unless you’re like grilling yeti filet over heated moon rocks, you won’t impress me by grilling.

I have deeply conflicted feelings about Ina Garten. She’s the kind of person I could be friends with…if she didn’t so obviously dwell in a completely different socioeconomic universe. Also, her “simple chic” occasionally slides into just plain “simple”.

The Iron Chefs are all gods astride this world of mere mortals. I worship and adore them, because you know you have a pretty hefty pair to serve up some of that shit with a straight face. Carp ice cream? Why yes, I’ll have two scoops!

Sara Moulton. Dullest. Person. Ever.

I’m emailing Jaime Oliver right now to invite him to join Tyler Florence and me for some hot man-on-man-on-man action.

Bobby Rivers and Sandra Pinckney were decanted from the same cloning vat. They were genetically engineered to hawk tacky commercial shit in the most bland and inoffensive manner possible.

Marc Summers(link added) is the white version of Bobby Rivers, with a dash of that Al Roker “zing” added for good measure. He always looks like his makeup is melting off, and his smile betrays his fear of death. He creeps me out in a major way. Unless he marries Rachel Ray, they will both die alone. Also, his show “Unwrapped” is a shameless apologia for all of the corporate, mass-produced, unhealthy low-quality factory food to which almost every single one of the Food Network chefs are vocally opposed. But Marc will show you that mass-produced industrial food is just good, clean fun.

I totally heart Paula Deen. I know she probably seems hokey and trashy to non-southerners, but she strikes me as genuine, and I like her self-effacing style. She’s like Ina Garten with the stick pulled out of her ass.

When Al Roker dies, he will go straight to hell, where he will be made to pay far out the ass for his many, many sins.


I deeply disagree with any negative feedback about AB. Also, he did not even mention the anorexic Natalie Portman look-alike. Even worse, he didn't even go into the horror that is Emeril Lagasse. Most everything else is hilarious and right on. Although Tyler Florence annoys me, I do like the idea of him and Jaime Oliver feeding me grapes...
I think I will have to add on to this assessment later.