You Whore!

I alwasy thought puttanesca was a tomato-based sauce characterized by the addition of olives and/or capers. At least that is what I told my little sister who heard it mentioned in Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunatel Events. However, with a little research in The FoodNetwork Encyclopedia, I found a very surprising description: Continued...

[poot-tah-NEHS-kah] Generally served with pasta, this sauce is a spicy mélange of tomatoes, onions, capers, black olives, anchovies, oregano and garlic, all cooked together in olive oil. A dish on a menu described as alla puttanesca signals that it's served with this sauce. The name puttanesca is a derivation of puttana, which in Italian means "whore." According to one story, the name purportedly comes from the fact that the intense fragrance of this sauce was like a siren's call to the men who visited such "ladies of pleasure."

Well, it does make it a whole lot more interesting. It implies a kind of aphrodisiac-like-quality. If I make this, will there be a line of boys outside my door? Yes? Awesome. I am all for it then. Does the fact that I cook this dish imply anything about me? About Mr. Snicket? Hmmmmmm...

This is certainly one of those "cooking as a performance" dishes, meaning that you kinda juggle a few things at once as you go along. As with any performance, one must "set the stage" and prep your ingredients.

(Again, I am terrible with keeping track of measurements. Just do it to taste, then it will become your very own)

First bring a pot of salted water to the boil for your pasta. Next, chop some tomatoes (whole from a can, or fresh), red onion, garlic, parsley, olives(green and black, and brown for that matter). Roll and halve a lemon, and have at the ready for the big finish. Drain some tuna that has been packed in (preferably olive) oil.

(Your water might be boiling now, add some spaghetti. Not angel hair, not penne. Spaghetti. Whole wheat actually works very well here.)

Now heat some olive oil in a frying pan over medium-high heat. Add some crushed red pepper flakes. When the little flakes start to jump from the pan, add the onion and a little salt. Cook until "the edge is taken off" the onion, add the garlic. Cook until you can *just* smell it and add the tomatoes and olives, and salt and pepper to taste. Cook vigorously, stir constantly. All the while watching your pasta, draining whenever it is finished, keeping it backstage in the colander. (Told you this was crazy) If your sauce becomes to thick, you can add pasta water, stock, or even some white wine. Ok, ok, preferably the wine. Add the tuna and parsley, heat the tuna through. Add the pasta and coat with the sauce. Plate. Finish with a squeeze of lemon, and a dash of olive oil. Voila!

I like to serve with a little arugula dressed with olive oil, salt, pepper and lemon, with sliced roasted beets (golden beets if you rock and don't want to deal with red beets that stain everthing). The bitter arugula and sweet beets compliment the spicy pasta.

Obviously you could add some capers, or anchovies to be more authentic, but I like tuna because it makes the dish more like a meal. You could also throw some cheese in there, but I like it as is. Whore that I am...